Tuesday, July 7, 2009

Care for a Good Back Scratch?

Once again, I faced the day today with overwhelming boredom. School is out for the summer, and I am finding the days to be extremely long and tedious. So when my dad asked me if I'd like to join him on his trip to Walmart, I couldn't very well say no.

Now, I am not a huge fan of Walmart. At all. But every time I go there there is no question that at the very least I will be entertained by the people watching. Let me tell ya, today was certainly no exception...

As I wandered aimlessly around the store with my dad while he shopped for his soda and dog food, I was snapping lame artsy-fartsy pictures of some of the nasty food there, see:





I hadn't seen super generic packaging like that since I lived in LA, and also, I find that stuff to be reminiscent of the cult classic - "Repo Man."





ANYwho... we finished up our shopping and proceeded to head to the least crowded line possible. By pure happenstance, the cashier at this line was one of my classmates in the sculpture class that I took last year! She was just as surprised to see me there as I was her, so we shot the shit about that class, blah blah blah. My dad and I were just about ready to leave, when I glanced behind me and I saw this lady struggling to get all of her stuff out of her nearly overflowing shopping cart. HO-LY SHITSICLES!!!! Now this.... this was.... completely unexpected!




No joke, this is that lady! I rarely shoot pictures of strangers as being a 'tattooed lady' myself, I get sick of being harrassed by stupid people. But NO WAY was I going to leave that damn store without taking this lady's picture! She was really cool about it, too, much to my surprise. I've gotta say, it was pretty much the most awesomely random, freaky thing that has ever happened to me at Walmart. Badass.

Funny thing of it is, my dad didn't even notice her at all and he was standing right next to her! As soon as we left I showed him the pic, and he of course got the heebie-jeebies looking at her insane fingernails. I was left speculating how the hell they never break, but then of course I realized they surely must break, but she probably superglues them back on, right? But I mean... what compells someone to do this? How much of a pain in the ass must it be dealing with those things? Literally. (Pooping/wiping, hello?) Driving a car? Shampooing your hair? Scrambling some eggs? Just witnessing her try to get that stuff out of her cart was painful to watch. I mean, what's the point of 'em (bad pun not intended)?

Crazy, man. Crazy.

165 comments:

Casey Brewer said...

Oh. My. God.

Casey Brewer said...

Purm spotted her at his garage sale a while back too:

http://img32.yfrog.com/i/gk9.jpg/

Anonymous said...

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Aaron Purm said...

apparently, she's a garage sale/thrift store connoisseur of sorts. when i posted my picture from the garage sale to spacebookfacepage, a bunch of people commented that she had also gone to theirs, or they'd seen her buying the most random shit,

wonder what she wanted with my old THRASHER t-shirt... size M.

Anonymous said...

WHOA! I'm sure she is a "Thrasher" with those nails, yo!

frank adam said...

If I ever start a massage parlor, she will be dishing out the 'happy endings'. That's just demented. I love eccentrics, but how does she wipe her coochie? That's got to be one funky coochie. Just nastay.

Unknown said...

Is that left over red nail polish on the ends of her nails?

Gross.

Casey Brewer said...

It's either that or the blood of mortals. Hard to say.

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